Helpful - Rated 
Some reviewers say this book makes people too self centred. I can see why there might be a danger of that. But it can also be a very helpful book. Some shame isn't very useful and can seriously harm people's lives. I am finding the book very inspiring.
Victims' charter - Rated 
Almost single-handedly, John Bradshaw has created the 'shame' industry. Shame is no longer regarded as a useful emotion which prevents us from repeating shameful acts. Instead it is represented as a false and negative condition which is foisted upon us by others.
There are, of course, individuals who carry around a burden of shame that does not properly belong to them. Such instances are mercifully rare and often involve early abuse.
According to this new doctrine, however, we are all victims, who are 'shamed' by other people. Shame is 'toxic' and is instilled into us by our close family, especially by 'toxic parents'. We are thus entitled to feel very sorry for ourselves and very bitter towards our persecutors.
This view of the matter is, of course, extremely popular. We love to be told that we are hard-done-by and that all our resentments are completely justified.
Unfortunately, it doesn't help people to get well.
Muddled and self-indulgent - Rated 
John Bradshaw appears to have pulled off an old deception, practised for centuries by quack doctors and mountebanks everywhere. He has invented a malady ('toxic' shame), has then persuaded thousands of gullible people that they are afflicted with it - and is now peddling his patent treatment for this fictitious condition.
There is no objective evidence that 'toxic' shame exists. Yet again, hapless parents are being demonised in the eyes of their self-obsessed offspring. This book encourages people to blame others and to avoid taking responsibility for themselves and for the solutions to their own problems.
It will be welcomed enthusiastically by all who love to flounder around in a swamp of self-pity.
If you are serious about recovery and growth .... - Rated
After years in AA and Al-anon and starting ACA now, I am at last in a place to face the issues covered in this wonderful book. It need not take that long hanging around the 12 steps to reap the benefits herein, but that is how long it has taken me to be ready. This publication pulls no punches and tells the truth of the matter with integrity, but also with a consumate sensitivity and kindness. Perhaps best of all, this is one of the few recovery books that outlines positive exercises, for example utliising NLP techniques, to work on - perfect for the compulsive "doer" like me. If you had any kind of dysfunctional childhood (didn't we all?) get a copy of this book rushed to you now!
Very highly recommended. - Rated
This is the most helpful book I have ever read.
I'm an adult survivor of childhood sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse and abandonment. Although I had made a lot of progress through counselling, self-help and other reading over the years, it wasn't until I read this book that I came to understand a lot more about myself.
I've read other books that seemed to stop short of providing much in the way of useful help after identifying a problem. John Bradshaw covers all this, providing real solutions that, for me, are starting to change my life and repair damage that I hadn't realised was still there.
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