I'm Grieving as Fast as I Can

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Should be prescribed on the NHS - Rated
I was attracted to this book by the title as, having lost my husband in tragic circumstances (killed by a drunk driver) 6 months before, I was fed up with some friends thinking I should be 'further on than I am'. I also couldn't find any books that spoke to me, a young widow, married for 10 years whose husband hadn't died of natural causes. Most seem to apply to people who had reached a 'ripe age'. I liked the fact that it didn't judge but accepted you wherever you were and covered such a wide spectrum of situations. As I read this book, I laughed at times at how accurate it was and cried also as I could finally see phrases which put into words what I was feeling. My favourite quote about the bereaved needing people support 'If you see a drowning man, you don't tell them to give me ring sometime you just go and help"
So I wasn't alone and I was right to feel angry, guilty, pathetic etc. This book, brilliant friends and anti-depressants are seeing me through!

Made me feel less alone... - Rated
I had been warned by others that this book was no use to me, as my partner died before we'd had the chance to marry or have children.

However I thought it was wonderful, the quotes from other young widows summed up my feelings exactly, all those feelings that made me think I was crazy were finally expressed by others.

However I think it would have benefited from a chapter on young widows without children, and again it was annoying that the unmarried chapters talked so much about AIDS (I agree that this should be a totally different chapter)

but definatley worth a try!

Useful But Flawed - Rated
I decided to pick up a few self-help books on coping with bereavement. This was one of them, and I’m sorry to say that I have been left disappointed by it. It was in need of a good editor to put everything in the right order. I was particularly annoyed by the way the chapter dedicated to unmarried lovers who had lost their partner was more than half taken up by a discussion of what to do if AIDS steals your partner. I felt this should have been an entirely separate chapter.

This book is not a total washout, however. There is a very useful discussion of the different kinds of guilt, which everyone would find useful. There’s a lot of gentle encouragement from the author to help you think more clearly about your loss, and also to help you see when people are trying to use their guilt on you to make them feel better. The author urges you to stand up for yourself in these situations. But at the end, I closed the back cover and found myself dissatisfied. In conclusion I would say that there are better books out there for the unmarried bereaved than this one, but widows/widowers would definitely find it useful.

A great resource for young widows - Rated
Since my husband died I have found it difficult to find help for young widows. Nothing seemed to fit me. This book really helped validate what I was feeling.

Excellent resource for young widows and widowers - Rated
Being a young widower only 7 months into this hell I found that this book was very helpful in explaining that I was not alone in this world and there are many others like me. The many quotes used in the book have been said over and over in my mind a thousand times. It covers topics that no other books I have found does like dating, personal and family stresses, and many of the guilts we place on ourself and how other place their guilt onto us to ease their own. If you are not a widow or widower it is still a wonderful book to help you understand us and how we think.

This book is a must for any young person who has lost a spouse or someone who is close to them. If you know of someone buy it for them Don't make them find it on their own like I had to. It is noted in this book and I must agree that it is not for the newly widowed...wait a couple months before giving it to them.