Once I Was a Princess

At the tender age of 17 Jacqueline Pascarl-Gillespie was whisked away to a marble palace in Malaysia by the dashing Prince Raja Bahrin. From the moment they married the charming, loving man she had fallen in love with in her native Australia turned into a cruel, uncaring horror who raped and beat her regularly while she, bearing the title of Princess Yasmin, was forced to suppress her intellect and maintain a public facade of aristocratic solidarity.

Following the birth of her two children, she returned to Australia, but far from walking toward freedom, she found herself enslaved again by a bitter custody battle which led to the eventual kidnapping of the children by Prince Raja Bahrin who returned them to Malaysia, where, seven years on, they still live without any contact with their mother. Once I was A Princess is 500 pages of almost unbearable pain. This harrowing autobiography of one woman who had to lose her own children before she truly found herself is not only a bitter account of a life of constant disappointment which begins as a child and builds to a death-defying crescendo in her adult life, but is also a story of love and passion so strong that a fight to the death seems almost inevitable.

A remarkable woman whose daily battle for her children has never lost momentum, Jacqueline has also found the courage to move on, setting up charities for children around the world and finding the strength to help other parents whose children have been taken from them. She is indeed a woman to be reckoned with. But behind the strength lies a sad, sad lady whose incredible past certainly makes for good reading, but is totally secondary to the fact that she is just a mother who, quite simply, wants her children back. --Susan Harrison

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Straight talking and brilliant read - Rated
This woman's book was an eye opener for me. A female friend gave it to me and I found myself drawn into Ms Pascal's descriptions and amazing journey - her experiences really made me understand the love of a mother much more deeply. She describes the moslem world in detail but still doesn't bag the religion at all even though it was used as justification to kidnap her children, Eden and Shahira.
I'm now looking forward to reading her second book, Since I was a princess.

a compelling story - Rated
A compelling read about a story that was big news in Australia at the time of the kidnapping. I'm a little offended by the review below which suggests Ms Pascarl saved the ending until her second book.

The first book was written in 1995 - her children were kidnapped in 1992. The second book has only just been published, largely because the children were only reunited with their mother last year (2006), 14 years after the abduction.

Both books are compelling reading in a time where parental abduction is becoming increasingly more blatant.

2nd book may be a better choice - Rated
Well done jacqueline who has managed to spin 2 books from her story by saving the ending of her story for the 2nd book.
Although this book is a very well written Biography of Jacquelines early childhood, through her teenage years & very detailed on the harrowing experiences she suffered at the hands of her Malaysian husban Prince Bahrin. More than 3 quaters of the book concentrate on "setting the scene" of the eventual & inevitable kidnap of Jacquelines 2 children by their father the Prince.
If you want to know the story & its ending maybe her next book "after i was a princess" would be a better choice, as this will no doubt skim through the details in this first book & tell of the reunion & then give closure to the whole story

Finally she gets to see her children - Rated
This book is excellent in everyway. The details of the suffering and the introduction of the malaysian royal family is well described. This book relates and introduces each chapter and story well. There are many small stories broken up in this one big story about a father kidnapping his children and the consequences on the mother and how she builds herself to handle the situation. Also to see what the mother goes through afterwards and other peoples reaction towards her, her rejection and the effects on other relationships is reflected well and very saddening.

In the book it was outlined that the children didn't like spending time with their father and when they were due to meet him they would make several excuses to avoid seeing him or spending the weekend with him.
What was interesting to see was that after 14 years the childeren have been reunited with their mother Uddin felt he has two homes now. Sarah has decided to live in Australia with her mother and she wants to make up for lost time. Also sarah and her mother have been in secret contact for over 3 years or so via email after sarah was able to track her mother down. It shows a happy ending to the story, but so many years have still been lost by the children and thier mother.

Also many people quoted as saying the mother was after the publicty and wasn't really interested in getting her children back. Also if she was found smiling in public while shopping people would say 'shes smiling she cant be sad'. This is the general publics misinterpretation of this story.


Very detailed. This gives courage to all mothers.

A very sad and heartrending book. - Rated
I have every sympathy for Jacqueline Pascarl-Gillespie and hope that one day she will be able to meet up with children again. Sometimes circumstances do change and you never know what's around the corner.

The book is well written and reveals a parent's anguish of losing her children and also being married to an abusive husband who forces an alien culture on his naïve young wife. She finds herself virtually a prisoner and in isolation to the outside world. It should help people who have been in similar situations to come to terms with what's happened to them.